Spartan Dawgs Tim Bograkos, Todd “T.J.” Duckett and Andre Hutson talk about failure and the impact it has on champions. Failure, they say, is the key to success.
“It’s good to remember your failures as long as you use these moments as motivation to improve yourself,” says Duckett.
Hutson says that athletes learn to deal with failure early in life.
“I’ve learned from failure, and now I’m not afraid of it,” Hutson says. “That no-fear spirit has carried over into the business world for me now.”
Bograkos says he takes little daily failures as chips on his shoulder and uses them as motivation to improve and prove his doubters wrong.
“Failure shouldn’t define a person unless you let the failures bring you down or hold you back rather than motivate you to improve and get better,” Bograkos says.
“There isn’t anyone who’s ever achieved a dream without a few failures along the way. Failure is just a step toward success,” he adds.
The Dawgs agree it’s important to not lower your personal expectations or goals because others may be doubting you.
“Your success of failure at anything often corresponds to the effort you put into it,” says Duckett. “And you can’t lie to yourself; you know how much effort you put in.”
“The hardest thing for people to do is self-evaluate,” adds Bograkos. “No one has ever achieved anything without experiencing a few failures along the way.
Eric Thomas offers a unique take on how he was pushed to success by his pain
There is a certain amount of happiness that I feel towards the current Wolverine basketball program. I see the excitement that each one of those coaches and players are experiencing and it reminds me just how special going to a Final Four is. I can relate to and understand what those athletes and coaches have gone through and invested. So my happiness comes from watching a group of people who have committed so much time and effort into something and seeing that investment blossom into the chance to fulfill a dream.
On the other hand, my happiness does not mean that I’m aligning myself with that fan base to cheer them on in the national championship game. The only school that I associate with and cheer for is the one I attended and graduated from. I laugh when people ask me if I’m cheering for them to win because they are in the Big Ten or because they are from the State of Michigan. I laugh because people seem to think I should join a group of fans that spent five years yelling obscenities and degrading comments about my teammates and me. Taking every opportunity to exploit any academic troubles or mistakes made in ones personal life, the group who yelled the same obscenities at our parents that were sitting in the crowd. NO, I won’t be cheering for them.
So my happiness for UM is centered around seeing a program make it to this point and knowing that they did it through hard work and sacrifice. It’s remembering how special my Final Four experiences were, the memories I share with my teammates and knowing that these guys get to do it as well. It ends at tip-off, when the game begins. As a famous coach here in East Lansing once said “nobody pulls for their rival.”
One of the basic needs of all human beings according to Tony Robbins is significance. Each one of us wants to feel a sense of accomplishment and success regardless of what we are doing. The one thing that comes along with that success is the development and growth of the natural human ego. The way we think, feel and express ourselves on a day-to-day basis gives a good insight into our individual egos.
We’ve all been around a person that has an inflated view of who they are and what they’ve accomplished. Your ego is always going to put your priorities on the top of your list. In these instances, ego is expressed through attention-seeking, power hungry, controlling behavior.
A big ego can cause resentment within any relationship and especially within a team structure. Nothing constructive comes from resentful interactions. Below you’ll see a few suggestions to deal with your ego and maximize your interactions
Let go of the need to win
Your ego loves to make things seem like it’s you versus me and if I beat you it elevates me above you to a certain extent. Winning is impossible to do all the time. You are going to lose occasionally because you are bound to run into someone who is better than you, at some point. Remember winning/losing and/or successes/failures do not define a person; they are simple outcomes to an individual event. We can’t look in the mirror and call ourselves a winner or a loser based on one specific event. Define yourself by how you handle those events.
Stop having to be right all the time
Your ego will act as a source of conflict for you. When you’ve became stuck on a point that you know is correct you will fight and argue that point regardless of right or wrong. Ego will cause you to forget that when we are in decision-making discussions, it’s not’s about who is right but it’s about what is right. We all have the need to feel superior. Your challenge is to stay focused on your growth and understand that that might mean you’re wrong.
Haters gonna hate – stop worrying about your rep
As much as we want to think that reputation is something that is inside of us, it’s a completely external factor. You might run into 10 different people through out a day and each person is going to have a different idea of what they think your reputation is. Your ego will spend a lot of time worrying about what others are going to think and what rewards you might gain. Remember that you need to stay focused on the PROCESS, not the OUTCOME. You have to take responsibility for what actually resides inside you: your character.
Anyone can give up, and lots of people do, because it’s the easiest thing in the world to do. But to keep going when everyone would understand if you stopped, that’s what winners do differently. In fact, this is the most significant principle of winning. Because without this kind of determination and persistence, the first nine points in this article wouldn’t matter. But when you combine determination and persistence, as described in point #10 below, with each of the other nine points below, that’s when the real magic happens.
On their relentless road to victory, winners…
- Take 100% responsibility. – Your life is your statement to the world, representing your values, beliefs, and dreams. It is yours to create, to enjoy or not enjoy, to fight or to be at peace. In the end, the very best years of your life will be the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your parents, society, or the economy. You realize that you control your own destiny. Read The Road Less Traveled.
- Focus on the controllable. – Life is a balance between what we can and cannot control. You must learn to live comfortably between effort and surrender. Life does not owe you anything; it has already given you everything you need. Freedom is not overcoming what you think stands in your way; it is understanding that what is in your way is part of the way.
- Eliminate the wrong things. – The true price of anything you do is the amount of time you exchange for it. If something you’re doing or thinking isn’t fixing or improving the situation, then it’s wasting your time. There comes a point when you have to choose between turning the page and closing the book.
- Maintain control. – Start shaping your own days. Start walking your own walk. This journey is yours. You know you were born, and you know you will die. The in between is all up to you. Stop wishing, and start doing. Either you run your days, or your days will run you.
- Keep good company. – It’s not always where you are in life, but who you have by your side that matters most. Some people drain you and others provide soul food. Be sure to get in the company of those who feed your spirit, and give the gift of your absence to those who do not appreciate your presence.
- Think constructively. – Change your thoughts and you change your reality. Our thoughts are the makers of our moods, the inventors of our dreams, and the creators of our will. That is why you must sort through them carefully, and choose to respond only to those that will help you build the life you want, and the outlook you want to hold as you’re living it. Read Learned Optimism.
- Conquer oneself. – Being yourself is the foundation of happiness. Knowing yourself is the foundation of wisdom. Pushing yourself is the foundation of success. It is better to conquer yourself is these ways, than to win a hundred battles elsewhere in life.
- Practice self-love. – We need to fix ourselves first before we fix others. Caring for yourself is not an act of self-indulgence, it’s an act of self-respect. The day will finally come when you have to accept that you need to be your own caretaker. There will be times when you’ll have to work hard to mother yourself with the compassion and patience that any messed up kid would need. Doing so will prove to be a great challenge, but a happier life is your reward.
- Work through the pain. – One day this pain will make sense to you. Sometimes it takes the worst pain to bring about the best change. The strongest people you know became strong because of the pain they once faced, and conquered. So in spite of all the put-downs and negativity you’ve heard from others in your life, stay focused on your goals, and remember that how you rise up is no one else’s business but your own. Read Man’s Search for Meaning.
- Keep going. – No matter what you do, no matter how many times you screw up and think to yourself that there’s no point to carry on, and no matter how many people tell you that you can’t do it – keep going. Pick yourself back up. Don’t quit. Don’t quit, because a few months from now you will be so much closer to your goal than you are now. Focus on the road ahead. Do something today your future self will thank you for.
Credit for this article goes to Marc and Angel Hack Life Blog http://goo.gl/nMvDI
Each day is made up of 84,600 seconds and each of those seconds that provide us with an opportunity to experience both positive and negative moments. Moments that will put us into situation where we will fail or succeed. Sometimes these triumphs or loses will be experiences on an internal level and other times these types of moments will be exposed on a national stage.
Too often in this current culture we look at the outcomes of our daily activities and use them as measuring stick to call us a successful person or a failure. We forget that success and failure characteristics of a specific person, they are words that define the act of a single event. One misstep doesn’t label you for every thing you do going forward.
In sports in happens after you perform poorly in a game with a lot hype and national recognition. We have a lot of people who will be ready to blame a loss on one specific person or play. Once those moments are over they are gone forever and you have to be ready to move forward.
The one thing that truly defines who you are at your core is how you react to the outcomes you experience both positively and negatively.